October2008

The past month has been one of the worst of my life. It is been an emotional and physical rollercoaster ride – the worst of its kind. I understand that smooth roads don’t deliver good drivers, but WOW there is a point of ‘enough for now’. As you know we are renovating our home and Ian is still working out of town, only coming home every second week-end, so it is pretty stressful dealing with the builders, electricians, tilers, painters and plumbers. A different kind of project to manage! Then I also have my commitment to my employer. With the renovations we have been lucky to have access to my brother’s home. My brother works in the UK but has a home just over 1 km from ours, fully furnished and unoccupied. So we have been living here for the past 2 months. Well, beginning October, Colin (my bro) sends down a Labrador puppy (Anouk) which has come to live with all his other dogs and the caretakers. Anouk was not even here for a week when she and Tobi (also a lab) were playing quite roughly and there was an accident whereby Tobi jumped up and landed on her leg. So off to the vet we went where Anouk needed an operation with plates and pin in her right back leg. The following week I had the wonderful news that my tumour counts were rising only to be confirmed as cancer again a few days later. The emotion of having to deal with all these things being thrown at us has been incredible. I will admit that I have been in a very dark pit and as I struggle to get myself out and positive again, I keep feeling the negative pull on the reverse. On top of all of this, Dylan had an accident Monday morning. I was in Johannesburg for the day and had arranged with a friend to collect the boys for school. Sean opened the visitors gate and went out thru it, then Tobi jumped up against the gate locking it. Dylan decided he would jump over the fencing rather than open the gate again. He had one leg on either side of the fence, started moving his back leg to swing it over and his front leg slipped. Causing him to crash land onto the spikes of the fencing. He went to school for an hour after which time he could not walk anymore, so phoned my friend to fetch him. Fortunately her father is out visiting from Oz and he is a medical doctor. He has a look and sent him off to emergency immediately. He has a haematoma on the scrotum. He spent 4 days in hospital as they were concerned an abscess was forming, after x-rays and scopes confirmed no damage to the plumbing. Thank heavens. Dylan is still walking around like the lone ranger with his catheter – hopefully this comes out tomorrow.

Then on Friday I went for all the medical screening for the clinical trials. My logic is that if I go for standard chemo now I will never that the opportunity to try the trials. If I go with the trials then I can reassess in a few months and return to standard chemo, pending the results. The good news is that my blood counts and chemicals are normal, my heart is very strong and normal and my lungs are just fine! The 3 growths are now 5 with a 6th one forming. The biggest grow 12.5mm 3 ½ weeks ago is now 21mm. All my tests have now been sent to Geneva for full screening and I should know by Wed whether I am accepted or not. Either way, Dr L (oncologist) has already processed standard chemo with the medical aid and this has been approved, so next week I will start treatment again.